Fear (False Evidence Appearing Real)

What really is this thing called fear that paralyzes us in our daily lives? According to Webster, fear is an unpleasant often strong emotion caused by expectation or awareness of danger. Fear is a huge part of what drives addictive behavior, and it is also one of the biggest obstacles to meaningful recovery and long-term independence. Even as you are reading this blog, fear is lurking around in your mind to devour you.

Here are examples of fear in addiction: (a) fear of going without the substance; (b) the fear of being caught using the substance; (c) the fear of what people will think if they find out; (d) the fear of the consequences it will bring to bear on our relationships, our responsibilities, our health, our jobs, our finances and/or our social standing; (e) the fear when we realize we are no longer able to control the addiction; (f) the fear of changing or asking for help; (g) the fear that we won’t find help; (h) the fear the help we find won’t work; (i) and even the fear that the help we find will work, causing a ripple effect in other areas of our lives. And many more variations in between.

Then there are also fears after seeking help such as (a) the fear that people will find out about our addictive past and view us differently; (b) the fear that we are too late to mend our relationships; (c) the fear that we are no longer employable; (d) the fear that we are going to “isolate” and never have any fun again because we are suppose to clean house by removing ourselves from people, places, and things of the past to which we have grown accustomed. And the list goes on and on.

Based on the acronym False Evidence Appearing Real, it is safe say that we are setting ourselves up when we let fear of the future captivate our mind. And this is where we invite the practice of mindfulness as the antidote to fear. Mindfulness as the word implies, is simply an awareness of our immediate thoughts, and controlling it with present activity. The fear comes when we are not in the moment but in the future. We have fears about the bills, the court date, the divorce papers, the impending diagnosis from the doctor, the future of the wayward child, the upcoming exam/test and the list goes on and on. When we allow fear to take up residence in our lives it becomes extremely hard to evict. When we do not focus on the here and now, we allow great ‘aha’ moments to pass us by; and in those moments may lie the solution to our fears. Remember that fear is rooted in our expectations. And in reality, much of what we spend our time fearing about does not happen.

But all hope is not lost. It is time to activate the faith button which oftentimes we had placed on hold. Here are 3 simple choices: 1. Choosing not to allow fear and anxiety to control your life; 2. Choosing to guard your heart; and 3. Choosing to focus your mind on what is true in the midst of uncertain times. As always, scripture speaks volumes on this topic of fear. The following scriptures verses should encourage us right now as we read if we are paralyzed with fear; Isaiah 41:10 “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. “I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Psalm 56:3 “When I am afraid, I put my trust in you."  Philippians 4:6-7“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” John 14:27 “Peace is what I leave with you; it is my own peace that I give you. I do not give it as the world does. Do not be worried and upset; do not be afraid.” and 2 Timothy 1:7 “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”

All powerful verses to grasp a hold of and meditate on day and night. Now there is one healthy fear that we should all hold on to which is in Proverbs 9:10 which states “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.” There you have it. You think about it.

Good morning! And Happy Labor Day!

Remember, “nothing changes if nothing changes”, and the same “person will always use.”

Have a Blessed day in the Lord! You deserve it!

From the desk of Andy Ansola